There were many stories that jiffed my tube this year but these are the ones that wiggled me. Yeah, thank you LMFAO for having made wiggle a must have word in my dictionary!

On January 23, Cavaco Silva is reelected President again in Portugal with a big margin. A sign of things to come.

The earth went berserk and showed us who is in charge. It trembled with earthquakes in Alaska, New Zealand and Australia. It saw the power of water with the tsunami in Japan. It twisted like potatoes with tornadoes in Alabama that killed 238 residents. It teared down with the floods in Australia and Brazil displacing and killing many. It iced down like ice cubes with twenty inches of snow that buried cars everywhere and as if it was not enough, the earth cries in the Philippines as the death toll from current storm tops 1,400. The northeast of US was rattled by an earthquake and an hurricane, and thought they were watching the History channel.

The arabs did the twist and danced the macarena, and booted dictators (Zine El Abidine Ben Ali in Tunisia, Moammar Gadhafi in Lybia, who would have thought; Mubarak in Egypt, Ali Abdullah Saleh inYemen) out of the office like pancakes to what has become known as the Arab Spring but Castro is still down after years of embargo. Humm, his little peep Chavez is trying to pimp his mantra but the walls are painted gray.

The US and the world went to sleep one day intoxicatedly happy as the world learned that Osama Bin Laden no longer was wanted Dead or Alive but had been TKO in style by the awesomeness of some ninjas dudes. It was a good day indeed!

Congresswoman Gabriela Gifford made an extraordinary recovery having been shot in the head by a mad man but it did not stop her from seeing her husband Mark Kelly off to pilot Endeavour on its final mission. Shuttle Atlantis brought the US space program to a close.

The nation observed the 10th anniversary of 9/11 and the rebirth of the area, as we could barely contain ourselves, the Iraq War was finally over! Meanwhile, the peaceful Norway stopped handing out Nobel Prizes and saw its first violent act in the name of Anders Behring Breivik. Bystanders on their way to their everyday lives are caught in the act in a big way by pulling a guy out from under a burning car in Utah!

The legal case and the name Casey Anthony who was found innocent in the trial for the murder of her two-year-old daughter Caylee, became a pi in a pie, an explosion of measurable proportion that Nancy Grace, the Superwoman of righteousness, had a name for it, tot mom. She is further looking for applications for her one woman show. The innocent until proven guilty shall not apply!

In the scandal tabloid of d’jour, oh Lindsay Lohan, well oh Mike Lohan. Anthony Weiner tweeted his way to the wall of shame politician with a self portrait of sizable proportion. John Edwards cuteness dissipated like the rain drops on the ground and Dominique Strauss-Kahn (huh, like in who in the fudge is he?), France’s President in waiting and ex-FMI chief got naked with and was dethroned by an hotel maid. Rumor is, he was set up. Just like OJ, they are still looking for the perpetrators. Unlike OJ, there may be a light!

We said goodbye to hilarious and sometimes acerbic Andy Rooney, oh I miss those assays. We miss Elizabeth Taylor and her jewels. Amy Winehouse left many speculating on what could have been. Steve Jobs left us wondering what else he had up his sleeve. Dan Wheldon proved once again that the sports is dangerous but we still love it. Christopher Hitchens fought hard but left us wonder if he has seen purgatory. Heavy D. what a shock you were too young. Peter Falk, Colombo no more. Cesaria Evora, Cape Verde has lost a giant. Betty Ford and Joe Frazier you are at peace.

While Greece melts, Spain, Italy and Portugal look from afar trying to get their mojos back and the rest of Europe saving itself from collapsing. Yeah what’s up Euro?!

In the south of Sudan, the people spoke and the Republic of South of Sudan was born as the women rocked the Nobel Peace Prize stage with Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, Leymah Gbowee and Twajjol Karman showing us that peaceable demonstrations bring results while Occupy Wall Street movement caught the bug by occupying any street as the notorious Don’t Ask Don’t Tell street finally came to an end.

I learn about bunga bunga with Silvio Berlusconi while Charlie Sheen went… coocoo cooco crazy. Winninnngggg!!!

Oprah said adieus to The Oprah Winfrey show after twenty five years and began her WON network while Regis Phelbin waved goodbye after 28 years almost as old as Kelly Rippa.

Erica Cain said “Oh no, you didn’t” as ABC said sayonara to soaps All My Children and One Life to Live.

Housewives of Lala Land suffered a blow with the suicide of Taylor Armstrong’s husband.
Jersey Shore said bonjourno to Italy, Snooki has written a book which she is still trying to read, and The Situation got his head cracked while trying to protect himself from himself. The X Factor and The Voice tried to slap Idol down but it stuck his tongue out and said, try again.

Kim Kardashian said, “I am married, oh no I am not” in 72 days longer then some people I know.

Chasty Bono who was always silent and timid before she became Chaz Bono, does DWTS while an hero, JR takes the trophy home and learn months later that he is going to be a father in 2012 while Bey Bey in a scene fit for a movie, carefully orchestrated the announcement in the red carpet, yes haters, I am pregnant. Jay-Z raised his hands to second the motion.

Wills fell in love with a commoner named Kate. He loves her, she loves him and her name is now Kathryn and then it was the Royal wedding of the year but Pippa Middleton said, “oh no, I am also here. Take that they like me too” and Princess Beatrice screamed, “nooooooo… my hat, my hat!

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s fathered a secret love child while his wife was blindfolded and the rest of the world learned that the Terminator was a Nacho Libre. Ashtor did the bunga bunga ending up as cover story with a woman name Sara Lee who is not baking cookies for Demi Moore.

The NFL and NBA came close to losing their seasons and almost passed out tissues to their fans as Pat Summitt, the famous coach of the Tennessee women’s basketball team was diagnosed with early-onset dementia.

Kobe Bryant’s wife finally woke up and served him with a cookie in a silver platter. She is expected to get half of his earnings as rumor is, there is no prenup. Catching, stupid!

Japan’s female team wins the Women World Cup igniting the country bringing much needed spirit while coach Joe Paterno fell from grace in the Penn State’s sex abuse scandal. Hum, common sense needed not to apply.

Tim Tebow is still kneeling for miracles while the NBA dudes find out that bargaining with people who have more money then them, requires a skill not taught in the basketball court but it was Garrett McNamara, the 90 foot wave surfer who had us in awe off the coast of Portugal.

The Help and Bridesmaid were the movie to watch, women ruled as the dudes crossed the pond in a drunken stupor evening waking up in Bangkok, Thailand in Hangover II. Hilarious they were perhaps but original they were not. Captain Jack Sparrow still showed us how it is played. Juicy!

The boy wizard hanged his hat as we waved adieu to Harry Potter and embraced the wedding of a human and a vampire in the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn Part I. Geez, I wonder how Part II is going to be. Tom Cruise showed us that he is still has it by jumping off the tallest building in the world. Katie said, “you better sign these papers”.

In the cheer politics of d’jour Barack Obama sit still trying to pick from the Yes I Can menu before the day is over, Mitt Romney so desperate wants to be a President that has flipped flapped like an omelet, John Boehner has cried his balls out more then any woman I know in menopause while Herman Cain said, “I wanna be a President, I wanna be a President” until a few Caucasian women stopped by but Tiger Woods said, “oh no, you didn’t” and he went back to deliver pizza.

I never though I would see the day when Rupert Murdock would be raising his hands to tell the truth nothing but the truth so help his God for hacking into people’s account or be sprinkled with a flying pie but saved by his “don’t mess with me” amazon volleyball young wife. Good TV indeed. It could not have been written better but army intelligence analyst Pte. Bradley Manning and/or WikiLeaks’ founder Julian Assange would concur that hacking may not be so bueno after all?!

California Gurls Katy Perry brushed up my valley girl make believe. Lady Gaga reminded me that I was born this way and tried to bring me back to my Madonna hay days to no avail. Adele had me going. Brit Brit brought me joy. Bieber sang his baby, baby almost to a baby bump. Bruno Mars kept my heart beating softly. Friday, Friday by Rebecca Black became the most popular song on google, hum ok. Wiz Khalifa whizzed me. Nicki Minaj “boy you got my heartbeat runnin away, can’t you hear that boom, badoom, boom” had me boom, boom, boom but Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO rocked my boat and I am still shuffling.

Ok Rihanna, I hear you!

On a personal level, I participated in The Weekender – Gallery Night on Main Street in August, The Gallery Night on Main Street – Best In Show in October, Art Takes Miami 2011, Women’s Event and Christmas Bazaar 2011. Works by Ampablue Creations! Become a friend of the page https://www.facebook.com/ampablue

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